So much bigger...

It's been one of those days...this is a good thing, because it was one of those days that has left me feeling joyful, full and very grateful. I've been trying for the last few hours to pinpoint what I should write about it and how I could possibly capture these emotions but it's all so much bigger than that.

Shortly after JNS and I got married, he indicated a strong interest in going back to business school. I would call my initial reaction to his aspiration "surface-level" supportive. At first glance, I knew it was a respectable path, but when he really wanted to talk about the possibility, I would shut down. The idea of b-school made me worry - after all, school is time consuming, costly and risky. Who wants to knowingly enter a change of lifestyle that results in a loss of income, security and predictability? I would think to myself...has he lost his mind? Does he not know that I am an insurance underwriter that analyzes risk? Has he any idea that I had my own plan for our finances and future? :) I'm sure you know where this is going...

Fast forward several months and JNS was studying for the GMAT (the test you must take to apply for b-school). He explained to me he was just taking the test. This didn't commit him to anything but it was good timing to at least sit for the exam. His score would be valid for 5 years and the further out of undergrad he goes, the harder it will be if he didn't go ahead and take the test. So I watched him study and in the meantime we started to talk about school. I still resisted the idea - I couldn't get on board with him quitting his job and going back full time. Somewhere along the way, I couldn't help but question if I was wrong/right about my position about school. I honestly didn't know if I was supposed to whole-heartedly support this desire of John Neal's or if I was supposed to be the voice of reason. I did something that I wish I could say I did more often... I directly asked God to guide my heart and help me to be the wife that John Neal needs...whatever that means. What happened over a matter of days is so much bigger than anything I could ever do...my heart literally transitioned and wanted to support this dream of b-school. So he took the exam and did well (not good enough for his own standards so he would take it again several months later) - we celebrated with dinner and we both felt this was a pivotal moment as we were committed to this adventure for his career/education.

I would typically classify myself as a worrier. This season of our life has not been immune to these human tendencies, but I must recognize that my faith has brought a sense of peace during the studying, application process, waiting period and discussions. There are countless references in the Bible to reasons why we shouldn't worry. I have found myself clinging to the belief that worry will accomplish nothing, AND even better, we have been given the ability and privilege to present our requests and desires to God. My natural instinct to worry is not gone, but what an amazing revelation to look back and see that during this process I have felt surprisingly calm. That's not Hailey...it is so much bigger than anything I could do.

And here we are, a few months after the application process, many months later from the GMAT studying and a year after God moved my heart to a place I couldn't get to alone. We just found out that John Neal got accepted to Emory - which has all along been both of our "secret" favorite. We have been praying that God will point us in the direction that he wants us in - and we thank Him because He has made this path for us abundantly clear. He has embraced us as we have leaned into Him on this journey in our lives. How cool it has been for us to acknowledge and truly experience that God, who is so much bigger, is in control of our lives...I am truly thankful that the Lord has shown us what reliance on Him and our faith can do for our relationship with Him, individually and in our marriage.

Hindsight is supposedly 20/20...I don't know if I agree with this, because sometimes I don't think we'll always know why things were done a certain way or how things get where they do. But I do know that I can credit this season of life as a time of growth, faith and strength. My patience was pushed to the limits (as most of us will admit, the Williams family was not equipped with a great deal of patience...), my faith has been increased (God wants us to know His plan is not always easy, but it is best for us) and my joy is overflowing!

I am grateful for this experience - I could not be MORE proud of my hubby or MORE excited about the fun that lies ahead of us. I'm so thankful that we can trust God (who is so much bigger than anything we can do or be) with all that is to come. :)

A big thank you to all those who have been praying with us and for us...we could not have gone through this without each one of our family members and friends. I realize this was incredibly long and there were zero pictures - but I wanted to share the good news from both today and the whole journey. God is good. Love you all!

52 Pix - Week 4

I was delighted to be asked to take some photos of precious little William this week. He is my friend's neighbor and was too much fun to hang out with for an hour. I enjoyed our little shoot and loved getting to know their family a little better. Thanks for a fun afternoon! :)

Cookbook Challenge

The January edition of the Cookbook Challenge is up on Cassie's blog. Check out the many great recipes! :)

Birthday Celebration at the Lake!

We spent this weekend at Lake Hartwell with my family. Normally when I say family that could mean just our parents, or one of my sisters - but this weekend everyone was there! It really was a great weekend and so fun to be able to celebrate both Mom & Dad's birthdays with all 10 of us!



Hadley &
Reese

It was also a real treat to be able to spend some QT with my precious little nieces. It's hard to believe that Hadley is growing up so much...it feels like every time we see her she seems so much older! Right now she is big on saying things like "I missed you" when you leave the room for a little while or "I like your t-shirt" when you change clothes. And Reese is the smiliest (is that a word?) little thing I have ever seen. You just look at her and she breaks out a huge beaming grin - it makes me melt every time!

Love these girls! :)

52 Pix - Week 3

This week we had our first book club for the year. For 2011, we decided to add a twist to our old book club format and all read the same books. Most people assume that is what you're doing when you're in a book club, but for the last year and a half we have really conducted more of a book swap (bring books and trade with each other month to month...). We started off January/February by reading To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee. So far we're all enjoying it...some folks have already finished it! This month was my turn to host and I prepared a baked potato soup with little toasted sandwiches for all the girls. The soup was yummy (recipe found here) and thought I would share a photo here for week 3 of my picture project. If there is one thing I hope I get out of this exercise, it's to improve in the area of food photography!

52 Pix - Week 2

My photo for week two of 2011 simply had to be from our crazy snow week. Like most everyone, I was about to go insane after several days of feeling trapped, but this picture captures all the joy from day one of the snow.

Snowman & Snow Mully

We loved building a snowman, playing outside with Mully (who just LOVED the snow), and spending time with the Lonergan's! I'm glad the ice is gone, but sure did enjoy the fun the winter snow brought to us!

Happy Snow Day....

Growing up in Metro-Atlanta, you are raised to appreciate a dusting of snow - it might be the only snow we get all year! So for us to have received 2 separate snow occassions within just weeks is unprecedented. Snow came in Sunday night harder than I can remember ever seeing - we got about 4-5 inches at our house!

John Neal threw snowballs at our window while Mulligan and I tried to stay warm!

We all went outside to play and Mully loved jumping around, dipping his nose in the snow, and trying to paw at the ice.

My mom gave us a Snowman Kit for Christmas - if I'm being honest, I thought it might never get used, but boy was I wrong! (Snowman Kit= scarf, hat, buttons, carrot nose and a pipe)

Tim & Laura came to play and help build the snowman - Mully loved the company!

Our masterpiece....

Happy

Snow

Day(s) 2011!